I’m not sure if I want to spend the day out

if it means missing a chance to spend time with her. Nowadays they’re infrequent and it’s not that I’m greedy for more time, it’s that I don’t know how to rely on it when I can’t anticipate it. Saturday only comes once a week for both of us, and if neither of us are free, then we don’t talk much. Sometimes I just want to wait at home all day waiting. She messaged me and I was out and I told her I’d be back soon, an hour later I was back and I already missed her.